LAUREN WEST: A MEMOIR
ch.4
hell hath no fury like a scorned woman.
Why?
What is life? What makes life worth living.
How do you do that?
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What if I was just tired of living a life prescribed by external opinions and dictations?
What if I just wasn't feeling it.
It's not like Chicago didn't do damage to me. It's not like Chicago didn't do a number on me.
Being a target isn't easy. It's exhausting.
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What if doing everything the "right way" wasn't right for me. What if other people's opinions don't matter. Are they successful? Do you want to be like them? Are they fulfilled? What's so great about them.
I'm adopted. Very adopted.
I am international not an immigrant. I am elite. I am American and conscious of the world to a decent extent, considering their indecency as a counter. It's all about balance. The Devil is in the details...
It's the little things, I always say.
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While evil was doing what they did, I was having real inner shifts and awakenings by myself - coming to my own conclusions on my own. My own mind. My own soul. My own body. For once.
Then they raided.
Something must've reached a tipping point...
The Mystery of Life and Death and Insurance and Extortion and Blackmail and Espionage and Lies and Gossip and Collusion and Conspiracy which is Organized Crime and All That Jazz.
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I never really thought of myself as important which means that I am more important than I think. I never used that word prior to Florida other than as a toddler with my headband necklaces and bracelets in Delaware with my Importmant Papers. I think I was telling them that I need to sue them and see all of my adoption and medical papers and finances.
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When truths are expressed. The guilty always just react with verbal abuse and lies. They're gross like that. They are brainless sadists and masochists that are machines of abuse and lies. Those need to be removed from society and disposed of permanently. That isn't fair to the good people who do the right things and the collective and children of future generations. Population control.
How do people know what a life is if they hate themselves and are dirty and low. How do they know that their fanciful notions and distorted judgments based on assumptions rather than facts or truth are correct.
How do people enjoy voodoo and black magic. They like to manipulate for control by virtue of being narcissists, bipolar, and shameless psychopaths and sociopaths that lack empathy, morality, and ethics. How do they live like that?
•
Narcissists are permanently like that. They will never change. It is a condition that never gets better so the only solution is ending them. They project and scream and abuse by saying what they are about you. They say, act your age. So why don't you? It's never fair, and they are absurd one-sided hypocrites. Lies of omission and commission with emotional coercion and violence and abuse. They are addicts and thieves. They always take without permission and never give. The Disrespect and lack of Remorse.
The end of the line. The point being - everything comes full circle. What happens in the dark always comes to light.
Jealous people are never lovable. Ugly people are never beautiful. Liars lack a truth. Copycats dont have a pjrpose.or a truth. Ignorant people are always wrong and lie.
Takers never give.
Ever notice that.
The Giving Tree ended up as a lonely stump. Was that worth it?
How depressing.
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Selfish and greedy people never give credit where it is due and will take every inch it can steal and eat a mile.
That is what a narcissistic abusive relationship feels like.
Then they spin webs of elaborate lies for an illusion of sustenance for their blood lust and power hungry megalomania. That is the profile of a cult leader. They are weird freaks that want power over people and falsely claim kinship to some god or unearthly spirit to get money and control people like slaves to take their children since they are incest pedos and rapists.
Usually there is a racist angle...
That is predatory. Predation.
They are crazy.
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All of that revolves around one thing only - money. They are greedy and sinful and selfish. Manipulation is their lifeblood for coercive control so they can slowly but surely weather down the mind until the walls come down so they can burrow in with false praise and manipulative rapey language - sexual undertones.
That is how they bait and trap their human prey. Well... you are so special to me. There is nobody like you. You mean so much to me. Where would you be without me? What would I do without you? You like it. Yes. You know you want it. You like it. I need to see you.
... Touch ....
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That is my upbringing, and I learned early. It's fun to play them and ride the emotional roller- coasters of pointless loveless time-wasting forced dynamics due to adoption and law. Isn't that the American Dream?
Blessed. Chosen. Grateful.
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Evil people are always ugly. Have you ever noticed that?
The ones who are always trying to look good. They are appearance-focused, superficial, and socially masking in any type of public setting. Those are the ones who are always looking for a show and desperately want to put one on to garner attention. They are criminally jealous and heinous in their mind, that they think is invisible to the world. Who are they when the cameras are gone, when no one's looking, when they're just with themselves - most likely miserable, ugly, low vibe. Isn't that the real problem? People who are the problem and spread their mess energy everywhere and force it on others only to prey and leech on to take without giving. That is called unreciprocated. It is just plain deception for thievery.
Do they call that a smokescreen?
What's the death toll these days. Everybody's already forgotten about Ukraine war. Is it 600 dead in Iran? What does that mean. Why does that matter. I haven't eaten in days.
I am 35. How many years have they stolen. How many years have they taken. In that time, how much have I grown. How much have I created. How much have I changed. How has that been reflected and mirrored in the world. So much hatred in the world. Their cruel mockery is just jealousy thinly veiled in ignorance and displayed as humor, because they don't know how to laugh or love or live. What a miserable brain. What a horrible soul. They must hate their life. I bet they don't even like themselves. Is that why they're like that? Why so much overcompensation without sufficient substance? They don't know what back it up means.
Isn't it a shame that they're all like that. Why are they all like that? Well, that's not my problem, job, or responsibility. That's their weight to carry. Not every baby needs to be born. Does it?
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Every baby is a gift from God. Every blessing comes with a lesson. Bless your heart.
You don't have to worry about me. I always figure it out on my own, eventually. Hope floats, and what's done in the dark always comes to light. You can't hide the truth forever. Why do you think there's so much secrecy and division of people amongst cults, covens, and societies. While you think you're getting away with murder and doing "real" investigations with "conspiracies", the ororourbos always turns back on eatself to bite its own tale. Don't cut off the nose to spite the face. Nose knows. Don't throw the baby away with the bath water.
Men always walk on the outside of the sidewalk.